March 3, 2008

But What do you Tell the Children?

Posted in Uncategorized tagged , , , , , , at 3:57 pm by Kathleen

One of my big fears right now, and part of the reason for secrecy regarding my own personal information, is the fear that my MIL will find out about our lifestyle and use that as an excuse to take our son away.  Now, my MIL is a good person, and she loves both me and my husband.  The problem is that her love is superseded by faith.  Strong, Baptist faith, to be exact.  Until my husband convinced her to stop, her love took the form of telling me how sad she is that I am going to hell because I am pagan.  I am somewhat concerned that her love might also eventually take the form of taking our son away because it is “best for him”.  Now whatever happened to mother knows best? 😉

Seriously, though, this is the reason that we were initially intending to keep this life a secret from our now 5 month old son.   How would he handle a secret like that?  But then we realized how improbable it would be to keep such a secret from him, and eve more so, how sad it would be to not allow him the affection of other potential long term partners of ours.

We plan on telling our son as much as he is old enough to understand, starting with “friends” and moving on as he and eventually our other children ask questions.  It scares me a little, yes, but I have to have faith that if what we are doing is not wrong, then we should be able to protect our family.  And if it comes to it, yes, I will choose my son over poly… but I don’t think I will ever have to make that choice – I certainly hope I don’t.



  1. Mada said,

    Very interesting post. I have seen families in this situation in the past and as a teenaged outsider, it seemed weird to me. I think what was the weirdest (at the time from my own sheltered bubble) is how well the daughter dealt with it. She knew that she had her mommy and daddy, and then she also had others living with them who loved her just as much. As an adult, I must admit that I’m very much intrigued and I love reading your blog to peer in the window of someone living the lifestyle.

    I wish you luck in dealing with your MIL. Hopefully you won’t have to cross that bridge.

  2. Kathleen said,

    Thank you. I, too, hope that I never have to cross that bridge.

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