March 23, 2008

All in the Family

Posted in Uncategorized tagged , , , , , , , , , , , at 7:24 am by Kathleen

Although my parents are by no means ready to hear that I am poly, I thought a couple of months ago that my brother, who loves, cares about, and looks up to me, might be. We were playing darts in my office (the hallway is the perfect length to throw darts from the office doorway to the bedroom door where the board is mounted) when I brought up poly as an idea, and then told my brother about Michael’s relationship with Becky (who he was still dating at the time). I also told him a little about BDSM without going into too much detail. If you’re jumping in, might as well go big, right?

Well it turns out that my brother found the idea of poly odd but acceptable, and the idea of BDSM disgusting. Of course, he also thinks of himself as disgusting, since he has violent fantasies from time to time. (My brother and I talk pretty frankly about sexual stuff, in part because he hasn’t had sex and I am trying to offer guidance and make him feel good about himself). I think I gave him a little peace on that front that day, and he promised not to tell our parents for fear that they might die of shock.

My brother now has a girlfriend. She is 16 (he is 19), which is funny since Michael and I were about those ages when we met, and she is a lot like me. Flirty, kisses a lot, but still a virgin – sexy and confident, but on the fringe… oh, and she’s definitely a bottom and possibly a masochist who fantasizes about being beat up and even raped (before anyone gets all righteous here, rape fantasies are INCREDIBLY common, and I enjoy them myself, so no judgments, please). They seem to be falling for each other pretty hard, and I find it all very reminiscent to how Micheal and I met and fell in love. What a great story! They are apparently going to have some great kinky sex and, even better, they talked about poly together! They agreed that it would be too confusing, but they are both teenagers right now, and Michael and I took a long time to warm up to the idea. Since my brother expresses no jealousy at the idea that she still has other crushes and kisses her friends, methinks we’re gonna have a pair of poly kinksters in the family.





  1. Dan said,

    That’s cool that you’re so close to your brother.

    Hope he has a nice relationship with her.

  2. Mada said,

    I think it’s great that you talk openly with him! As for the rape fantasies, yes, I agree that they are common.

  3. Please forgive my curiousity but…

    Are rape fantasies really that common? Are you differentiating between aggressive sex and rape? Because rape is a terrible thing when it happens. He or she has undergone a massive trauma which they may never recover from.

    Can you email me or expand on it here? I’d appreciate it. Thanks

  4. author in the making said,

    Being tied up is one thing. But pretending to be raped is another. I’ve been raped. It’s nothing to fantasize about.

    I know you’re right, though. A LOT of people have those fantasies. I guess I just don’t understand.

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