May 15, 2008

Sex and a Date

Posted in Uncategorized tagged , , , , , , at 2:24 pm by Kathleen

I’ve been talking to a very interesting man for a few weeks, so when he asked me out to dinner I accepted.  We had a three hour date last night, during which we talked, laughed, joked, and (I think) both had a great time.  Still, there was a part of me that was uncomfortable with the idea of sex.  After talking to Michael, I realized that it was the idea of sex in general that had me feeling icky.

Don’t get me wrong; I love sex.  I love sex.  But I am owned, and a big part of that is my sex.  That part of me belongs fully and completely to my husband, available for use at all times, and he even refers to it as ‘his’.  Which may be a large part of the reason that thinking of sharing that part with anyone else leaves me cold.

Michael wouldn’t object.  In fact, he told me last night that he was perfectly willing to share me with someone that I desire to date.  But that doesn’t change the fact that deep down, that part of me does not feel like it is mine to give or to share anymore.  I don’t really have any desire right now to have sex with anyone else, as desirable as it is to have a relationship and many of the other things that accompany that.

The man I saw last night (I may have to think up a blog nick name now) said that he understands this, and wants to date me anyway, with no expectations and no pressure for sex.  I really appreciate that, and I hope that we can continue to see and enjoy each other.  In fact, he has already asked when he can see me again.





  1. Rori said,

    That’s really tricky – being owned and being poly at the same time! My Daddy and I discussed trying it in the past and really, we both came to the conclusion that it wouldn’t work in the long run because I’m to attached to being “his” and he’s too attached to the idea that he and he alone owns me.

    Not saying that it can’t work (and I do know of some d/s couples that do it) but that’s soooo tricky…

  2. livininsanity said,

    Well, congrats on finding a person to date.

  3. stamperdad said,

    Sounds like you found a good friend with perhaps the possibility of more. Hope it works out the way you want it to.


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