February 29, 2008

Blurring Lines

Posted in Uncategorized tagged , , , , , , at 3:00 pm by Kathleen

I was talking with someone that I care deeply for, and who’s partner does not want us to have a relationship beyond friendship, and I had the urge to tell him that I love him.  We talked, and neither of us could really define the line between friendships and relationships.  Friends love each other.  It is, in fact, a big part of friendship.  The only difference that we could see is sex.  No sex for friends (in our case.  There are friends who do that, too.)

Seeking help, I turned to a friend on chat:

kathleen says:
Hey Steph, all sexual crap aside, what is the difference between friendship and romance?
Stephanie says:
sex
Kathleen says:
you are sooooo helpful

Funnies aside,  it doesn’t seem to be a concept confined to poly, however as a polyamorous person, I am in a unique position to experience friendships as deeply as I want without the fear of hurting or alienating my husband.  I find this freeing and beautiful, and I am really glad that I have the opportunity to love and to express my love for this guy.  I will probably continue to tell him so from time to time – I told him today – and I expect nothing from him but his friendship until and unless his partner allows more.  For now, it is enough to love and to be loved, and to be a good friend to him in all ways.

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